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The Haunted Bowling Alley

Posted in Appliances, and Food & Drink

Dino McRex and Patton Oswalt magically appear in a haunted bowling alley and discover a refrigerator filled with snacks.


In a land where time has no meaning, a dinosaur, Sir Dino of the Jurassic, stumbled upon a mystical portal and was transported to a haunted bowling alley in the year 2021. There, he met the legendary Patton Oswalt, who was as surprised as Sir Dino to find himself in such a spooky setting.

As they cautiously explored the haunted bowling alley, they stumbled upon a magical icebox, which Sir Dino recognized as a refrigerator, but to him, it was a relic from the future. The refrigerator stood tall and mighty, like a monolith from an advanced civilization. Sir Dino, with his scaly claw, opened the door of the refrigerator and was astounded by the cornucopia of delights that lay within. “By the scales of my ancestors!” he exclaimed. “What sorcery is this that keeps these victuals so fresh and cool?”

Patton Oswalt, equally amazed, began to describe the contents. “Behold, the top shelf holds the sacred nuts and snacks of the ancients, guarded by the elixir of the orange groves!” he said, pointing to the bottle of orange juice. They gazed upon the second shelf, where Patton spoke of the ketchup bottle, “This, my dear Sir Dino, is the blood of tomatoes, a delicacy amongst the humans.”

While they continued to marvel at the contents of the refrigerator, they noticed a group of ghostly figures gathered around a table, engaged in a spirited game of cards. Patton, always up for an adventure, decided to join them. Sir Dino watched as Patton deftly dealt cards with the ghosts. But, as the game progressed, Sir Dino’s sharp dinosaur eyes noticed something amiss. Patton was slipping extra cards from his sleeve! The dinosaur, being a creature of honor, was taken aback. Suddenly, the room grew cold and the ghostly figures turned their hollow eyes towards Patton. They had discovered his trickery!

Sir Dino, with a roar, stepped forward and addressed the ghosts, “Fear not, noble spirits! I, Sir Dino of the Jurassic, shall ensure that justice is served.” He turned to Patton and said, “In the land of the dinosaurs, cheating is punishable by sharing one’s hoard.”

Patton, realizing the error of his ways, agreed to make amends. He opened the magical refrigerator and offered the ghosts a feast of the delightful items within. As the ghosts partook in the feast, one of them, a ghostly figure with a bowling pin for a hat, took a handful of nuts from one of the transparent containers situated on the top shelf of the refrigerator. After taking a bite, he made a face and exclaimed, “By the alleys of the haunted, these nuts are saltier than the sea that the ancient mariners sailed!” The other ghosts tasted the nuts and agreed. The room was filled with the echoes of their ghostly complaints about the saltiness.

Eager to make amends, Patton suggested they use the nuts in a bowling competition. The ghosts were intrigued. They set up the bowling pins and used the salty nuts as miniature bowling balls. The ghosts and Patton bowled while Sir Dino cheered them on.

As the night grew late, the ghosts thanked Patton and Sir Dino for the feast and the fun. They gifted Patton a spectral bowling ball and Sir Dino a painting of the refrigerator as tokens of their gratitude. As they left the haunted bowling alley, Sir Dino turned to Patton Oswalt and said, “Though our journey was unexpected, it was an adventure for the ages. May your days be filled with honor and your nuts be less salty.”


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