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The Chain-Smoking Grandma

Posted in Building & Structural Materials

Sir Dino and Patton Oswalt drink tequila at Ryan Reynolds’s birthday rave in Minneapolis, where their friend Ian is pelted with a cigarette butt and takes a few hard knocks in a fistfight with a chain-smoking grandma.


On a brisk October evening, Sir Dino McRex, the time traveling dinosaur, and Patton Oswalt are standing outside Ryan Reynolds’s birthday rave in Minneapolis. The night is young and the air is filled with the pulsating beats of music. The dinosaur, wearing his special birthday party tuxedo, and Patton are sipping tequila, their spirits high.

Suddenly, a cigarette butt flies across the room and lands on the wooden deck with a soft thud. Sir Dino, with his sharp dinosaur eyes, spots it immediately. He bends down to examine it closely. The wooden planks are dark brown, worn with age, and have a rustic charm. The cigarette butt has a light brown filter and white paper, and it lies there innocently amidst the chaos of the night.

Patton, amused by Dino’s fascination, joins him in examining the cigarette butt. They both marvel at how something so mundane can exist amidst the glamour and frenzy of a celebrity birthday rave.

Ever the detective, Sir Dino starts to ponder the journey of the cigarette butt through the commotion of the rave, while Patton cracks jokes about its possible celebrity owner. They both raise their tequila glasses in a toast and laugh heartily as the music from Ryan Reynolds’s birthday rave continues to thump in the background.

Still chuckling, Sir Dino and Patton hear a commotion nearby. They turn to see their friend Ian engaged in a bizarre fistfight with a chain-smoking grandma! The grandma, with a cigarette hanging from her lips, is flicking her cigarette butts at Ian as they exchange blows.

Sir Dino’s eyes widen and he exclaims, “By the Cretaceous period, we must save Ian!” Patton, fueled by tequila and adrenaline, agrees and they both rush towards the scuffle.

But before they can reach them, Ian and the chain-smoking grandma tumble onto the dance floor, right in front of the DJ. The crowd goes wild as the DJ starts spinning a high-energy track to match the intensity of the fight.

Using his dinosaur agility, Sir Dino leaps onto the stage and grabs the microphone. He roars, “Cease this madness! This is supposed to be a party!” The crowd falls silent.

The chain-smoking grandma, still puffing on her cigarette, looks up at Sir Dino and says, “Well, I never!” She then flicks her cigarette butt onto the wooden floor.

Ian, catching his breath, spots Sir Dino and Patton on the stage. He shouts, “Guys, I know how to calm her down!” He then quickly pulls out his phone to search for old videos of Johnny Carson on YouTube, finds a classic episode and holds his phone up for the chain-smoking grandma to see.

The grandma’s eyes light up as she sees Johnny Carson on the screen. She immediately stops flicking cigarette butts and becomes completely engrossed in the video.

The crowd, still in shock, starts to clap and cheer as they realize that the fight has come to an end. The DJ plays a triumphant tune as Sir Dino, Patton and Ian escort the now-docile grandma to a comfortable seat.

They spend the rest of the night showing her more Johnny Carson videos, sharing stories and even teaching her some dance moves. The chain-smoking grandma turns out to be a hoot and becomes the life of the party.

As the night comes to an end, Sir Dino, Patton, Ian and their new friend, the chain-smoking grandma, take a group photo outside Ryan Reynolds’s birthday rave.

Sir Dino McRex, with a tear in his dinosaur eye, says, “This night has been an adventure to remember.” The chain-smoking grandma, now just Grandma, pats his scaly arm and says, “Dearie, sometimes the best adventures are the ones where you make new friends.”

They all agree and decide to meet up every year on Ryan Reynolds’s birthday to celebrate friendship and the night that brought them together.

And so, the legend of Sir Dino, the time traveling dinosaur, Patton, Ian and the chain-smoking grandma who loved Johnny Carson, became a tale passed down through generations, a reminder of the power of friendship, adventure and the unexpected twists that life can bring.


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